Sunday, August 22, 2010

Golden Rule

I detest hypocrisy. I try very hard to educate myself on social issues, political issues, and moral issues so that I can make an opinion, defend my opinion and then live my life accordingly. For me to be true to my religious beliefs, I must strive very hard to live them daily, not just listen to them weekly. Honesty, integrity, charity are all important to me. I always tell my children “if God were in the room with us right now, what would he say? Would he be happy or sad, proud or disappointed?” I feel it helps to guide our decisions, reflect on our choices and help us grow in our faith.

Several people I have come into contact with in my adult life proclaimed to be faithful. They wore the jewelry, they talked the talk, but when it came to walking the walk, they did not. I don’t think they just stumbled. The vicious intent of their actions led me to believe that behind the smile that they turn on so effortlessly, they are not kind people.

Thankfully, some of these people I was never that close to. I could make the choice to not pursue a relationship with them. No harm done.

Recently, I ended a friendship with someone who certainly talked the talk. The difference was I liked this person and I chose to build a relationship based on what I believed to be similar values and similar beliefs. When presented with a situation of choosing to help a friend deal with a personal issue, rather than offering assistance, comfort and support, judgement against the friend was passed swiftly, harshly and irrevocably.

At the end of the day, I am left reflecting on how my actions measured up to my beliefs. If I feel I have lived my day according to the Golden Rule, I consider it a good day. Otherwise, I apologize and make amends. I have learned I cannot account for the actions of others, only my own. In order to move past this latest chapter in my evolution of what friendship means, I ask myself, how God would feel if he were present right now? Did my actions speak to my faith. Yes, I believe they did.

I guess then I can finally move on.

1 comment:

Theresa said...

Once again, we have similar experiences. Inspired by your "Ten Things About Me" post, I have been working on (albeit mostly in my head) a similar post about how I have grown after 2 relationships ended this past year. It is such a struggle. I care about those people and even miss them. I tend to want to help everyone...but some people only want a specific kind of help or assistance and I was not willing to compromise myself any more. And then I was accused of being judgmental and I have been struggling with that ever since.

When you want to be nice, you strive to do God's is so hard when people have unrealistic expectations and then sling accusations at you, when all you wanted to was help.

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