Monday, November 15, 2010

Please don't hold it against me....

I keep getting asked when we can have a stay-at-home day.  I am trying really hard to make that happen.  A good friend recommended writing FREE DAY on my calendar once a week, blocking off an entire day just for me and the girls.  No outside appointments unless it’s an emergency, no errands, no outside lessons.  Just a day at home to learn and be.  We need that badly right now.
I feel like the holidays are rushing towards me.  Usually by now I have my Christmas cards ordered and the envelopes already written.  My shopping is mostly done and my house has been deep cleaned ready for Christmas decorations.  This weekend I was able to take all of Saturday and spend it with my Mom.  We shopped for thirteen hours before dropping from sheer exhaustion!  I was able to get many gifts and now feel like some of the stress have been lifted.  This is my first year trying to shop with children at home full time.  I don’t even have a picture for my annual Christmas post card that I usually send out to friends and family early in December.  It takes at least 10 days to get the cards from Apple, so I have to order them soon.  I have started cleaning, emptying my bookshelves, my mantle and shelves so they may be cleaned and prepared for the setup of our Christmas village.
setting up the village 2009

In addition to my stress over the regular Christmas duties, my girls wanted to throw a party.  Sure!  Let’s throw a party.  They wanted to have a “show and tell” where their friends could all bring a favorite poem, a story they wrote, play a song on our piano, or bring a collection to share.  We are also sharing a meal - potluck dinner!  I am looking forward to the afternoon but I have so much to do to prepare for it.
Then the following week Grace has her piano recital, and we will have a dinner after.  Thankfully that is the week after the show-and-tell party so my house should be clean and decorated already!
Add to this that I am tutoring a child once a week (which I love), teaching 5th grade Sunday School class (which I also love) and have offered to assist with the creation of a teen youth group room at our Parish Center.  I offered to paint chalkboard walls and murals.  I am hoping the teens will prepare the walls, prime and paint them and then I will outline the murals for them to fill in with paint.  I am looking forward to this project very much but it has left me feeling like I have taken on more than I can handle.
Today was a day where I missed the free time I enjoyed when the girls were in school.  I missed my clean house.  I missed the freedom to shop and do the daily household chores that never seemed so hard before.  It did not help that I had an argument with one of my daughters over math (not naming names....) which led to a tearful daughter and a frustrated Mom.
This is a stressful time of year.  Balancing lessons with life is harder right now.  Now it is even more important for me to honor the girls request to slow down, breathe deeply and savor the season.  It is not about the gifts, or the decorations, or the parties.  It is about the birth of a child two thousand years ago.  I need to keep that in mind and hug my two girls harder.  
Christmas card picture 2009

You won’t hold it against me if you get your card in January...will you?


mamak said...

Umm, you'll be lucky if you get a card from me! I mean, I am sure you will, but I am not making any promises... And that party, you can totally re sched it for Jan. Do it, if you need to. You will thank yourself. I promise!

Theresa said...

This MUST be going around. We have been non stop since last Thursday and my house is trashed and I am beyond tired and I just want to BE without any plans for a little while.

It's so funny...I have no idea why, but since I work part time, I feel like that is this weight on our time that I just can't get rid of. The library was closed last Thursday and it was like my week literally opened up! I felt like I had ALL THIS TIME, when it was really just 6 hours! Sometimes I think about leaving my job, but I LOVE it. I LOVE what I do there so much and I was just promoted to Assistant Children's Librarian, which will be the same amount of hours a week...and really, they are so awesome and flexible. ANYWAY, I always think that since you don't work, wow, Jessica must just have ALL THIS TIME and freedom...hahaha! Now I see the truth!!! I think we all feel like we wish there were more hours in the day. Jason asked me what I want for Christmas and there really is not any thing I want...what I want is TIME, a few more hours each week, but no one can give me that :(

Our week feels like, Monday we get zip done because we are at co-op (even though the girls learn a ton there, it's not math and writing and history). Tuesday is great and wide open for us (but they have choir at 4:45) Wednesday I have to be at work by 5, so it's fairly open. Thursday I teach Storytime at 1pm, and my mom comes to get the girls after her Bible study Thursday is a complete JOKE. Friday has that ptoential to go either can be great and we get tons done, but most likely we do a little then go to our park playdate, which is now becoming the winter homeschool group at the library and I am running it!! But we sometimes do lessons on the weekends....

Jessica said...

@MamaK - no way am I cancelling/postponing the party. I will love it once I am prepared. I have an amazing husband who cleaned the house last night. One hour and he makes it shine. Would have taken me all day...

@Theresa I have to do something with lessons. I hate having them spread out throughout the week. Monday flute, Tuesday piano, Wednesday cooking and sewing, Thursday girl scouts. Cooking ends this week. Sewing is at my neighbors so that is easy. Having Wednesday as a free day will make a big difference.

Karen said...

Isn't it funny how much busier you are when you "HOMEschool"?

I have such a hard time with this! On the one hand I want to get all the lesson plans I painstakingly planned done, but on the other hand what is the point of HSing if we can say "Punt the plans today, lets go on a picnic". I guess it all boils down to "what exactly is learning"? I like the idea of a FREE DAY.

Jess, you are not the same person you were this time last year. You don't have hours to yourself every day. But look at all you DO have. :)

Jessica said...


You are right. When you have a bad day it is easy to wish for what was...if only for a day. But there is no way in the world I would trade this new life for a few hours of time to myself. I just have to get more creative but having playdates, hiring local sitters and going out when Greg gets home.

Right now at this very minute my girls are writing lessons that they are going to give to each other to teach each other about the Greek myth they just read. This is learning. This is cool. This is worth the day here of there when I am frustrated.

Jennifer said...

Wednesday is the only day we are home for the whole day this week. Those days are looked forward to.

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