Maybe this week was not only about giving Grace wings to fly, but also about learning what kind of mother I will be as I enter into the phase of parenting more independent teens. I have complete peace about Grace being at Lead Week.
Her leaders are Godly men and women I like and trust.
The focus of the week is to learn how to lead peers in a Christian life.
Her friends are there to give her support.
The activities are awesome.
The facilities are clean and safe.
Still, a Mama's heart worries and while I am at peace, I also wonder what she is going, how she is feeling, if her allergies are acting up, if she is taking her supplements, if she is making wise food choices, if she is feeling included, if she is homesick, if she is sleeping well, if she is warm at night.....the list goes on and on and my phone has been silent.
It is so tempting to reach out and text "How are you?" or "What are you doing?" whenever I feel the worry, but that is not the Mom I want to be. I want to not only give her wings, but to let her fly. She cannot fly if I keep her tethered on a rope that leads to home. She knows I am here 24/7 for her, just a phone call away if she needs to hear my voice. If my phone is quiet, I know she does not need me and that can be hard to accept because not only is this her first time away from home, it is my first time sending a child away from home.
Last night as 11:00 approached with no goodnight or text, I did reach out to her and asked her to call just so I can be reassured she is truly fine and not just texting it but feeling otherwise. And you know what? She is fine. She is happy. Her allergies are acting up and she did fall tubing and smack her face, and she is having a bit of a hard time with food, but none of these things are holding her back from experiencing this week. Her friends have helped her with lozenges to soothe her allergic flares, they have whispered into the phone that she is fine, and they have walked beside her throughout these new adventures she is having. Armed with this knowledge, I can rest in the assurance that my girl is doing fine. Better than fine. She is surrounded by God's Glory, enveloped in the Word, and consumed by the Sprit. That makes this Mama's heart soar to new heights.